The Return of the Fullmetal Alchemist
by ChocolateCherryGenesis
Summary: When giving his brother Alphonse his body back, Ed made a deal. He would be doomed to live a cursed life again. When Naruto is given "fairytale" books that his parents wanted to have passed down to him, he slowly learns of Alchemy, and his eyes fade from blue to gold.
1. The Deal and the Awakening

**Story**: The Return of the Fullmetal Alchemist

**Disclaimer**: I don't own _Naruto_ or _Fullmetal Alchemist_.

**Author**: ChocolateCherryGenesis

**Summary:** When giving his brother Alphonse his body back, Ed made a deal. He would be doomed to live a cursed life again. When Naruto is given "fairytale" books that his parents wanted to have passed down to him, he slowly learns of Alchemy, and his eyes fade from blue to gold.

**Warning**: Some mentions of blood and temporary character death.

**Published**: Saturday, September 29, 2012

**Notes**: This is actually a pretty good idea, in my opinion. ^_^ The thought of Konoha's Number One Knuckle-head Ninja being the one and only genius Fullmetal Alchemist? I wasn't able to resist. And I made Naruto so cute as a kid! I hope you enjoy. Thank you for reading!

* * *

**Chapter One**

The Deal and the Awakening

* * *

_As Iruka walked out of the classroom to help with the young students on the playground, Naruto's eyes flashed a bright gold even from under their blue illusion . . ._

* * *

Edward Elric saw only a blank, white scape for as far as the human eye could see, with only two objects changing this pattern. The first was a large gate––_the_ Gate. The second was a white figure who's only feature was a black, wide smile on its inhuman face. This was the guardian of the Gate, a completely neutral being who only existed to ensure that the rules of Alchemy were kept. Killing and taking from the Alchemists who tried to bend or break the laws was its only amusement.

The white figure grinned as he saw blood flow liberally from Ed's numerous wounds, given to him in this last battle against the enemy known formerly as "Father" but now as Hohenheim's former acquaintance "Homunculus."

"So, what are you willing to sacrifice, _Mister Alchemist_?" it asked mockingly. "What could you possibly give me that has worth enough for your brother's life? Equivalent Exchange, remember?"

Edward's golden eyes narrowed dangerously, and his metal limbs creaked with the tension holding him in place as he faced the nightmares of this place with no fear, in order that his brother could be saved. He coughed, some blood tricking down the side of his mouth because of his internal injuries, before he spit it away.

"You know what I want," Edward said in a sort of challenging resignation, if there existed such a thing. "Name your price!"

The being smirked. "Well, Mister Al~che~mist," he drawled. "I want you to make things interesting again."

Edward was taken aback. "Wha . . .?"

"You see," the ruthless thing said. "If you win against Homunculus, the entire world will be wary of bloodshed and it will be at peace. On the other hand, if Homunculus wins, the entire world will be dead, and there will be yet another version of that detestable _peace_. So," the being said, smirking. "I want to see something interesting again."

"What do you mean?" Edward asked.

"I," the being said. "Want you to live twice. My terms are as thus: In exchange for saving your brother's physical form, you will live another life in the future as Uzumaki Naruto. And so, you will again walk the earth and make things interesting for me."

"I'm not some character to live in a story for your amusement!" Edward shouted, enraged. (1)

The being smirked wider, beyond what is possible for a human. "Oh, but you'll still agree, Mister Alchemist. Otherwise, your brother will die a dreadfully painful death, and you'll have failed him _as well_ as your mother."

"LEAVE HER OUT OF THIS!" Edward shouted, furious at the creature for reminding him of his failure––both at failing to bring his mother back to life and for attempting that particular taboo in the first place. He clenched his fist, the metal creaking even louder.

"Why?" the white-colored creature asked. "You will do almost _anything_ to keep a promise––especially to your precious younger brother. Even if it means that you'll have to live two lives before your rest instead of just one."

Edward's mind raced, trying to find another way––trying to find another agreement that could possibly sway the being in front of the Gate from his current terms. But, alas, he could think of nothing no matter how long or hard he thought.

"Fine!" Edward snarled.

The being's smile widened even further. "Then, I'll see you later, Mister Alchemist."

[] [] [] [] []

_Years Later_

[] [] [] [] []

Edward Elric stood in front of Central's main military building, looking around in awe at the changes to it. Then he marched over to Mustang's office––which annoyed him since it was absolutely _huge_ and thus must have been created just to remind him that after all these years he was _still_ shor––_No, Ed, don't think of the s-word. I'm most definitely _**_not_**_ short! . . . Arg! I still thought it!_

Ed then barged through the doors, his eyebrow twitching in his temper.

Mustang looked upward in surprise, his eyes widening as he caught sight of someone he had not seen since the final battle, years ago, after Edward had somehow miraculously healed Mustang's blind eyes, taken from him in "Equivalent Exchange" by the same being that made its agreement with Ed.

A short young man with long, blond hair and burning golden eyes stomped into the room, his brown traveling cloak billowing around him but allowing Mustang to see glimpses of Edward's favored black clothes with a red coat overtop, still worn underneath the worn, plain, attention-free cloak.

The young man's face was set in a well-used frown, his eyes narrowed as he started directly into Mustang's eyes with a scowl.

Mustang smirked, but before he could make any sort of attempt at humor, Edward interrupted.

"_No_ height jokes, _no_ teasing, and _no_ purposefully annoying me," Ed said shortly. "Or else _I'm_ putting _my_ auto-mail arm _through_ your **_scull_**––no exceptions."

Mustang grinned. "You've sure gotten testy," he said.

Ed plopped down into a chair, crossing his arms and generally putting off an anti-social vibe. "Those stupid societies keep insisting that I'm the heir of some ancient civilization!" he shouted.

Mustang raised an eyebrow. "And they're right."

A twitch pulsed above Edward's eye, before he blew up in the leader of the military's office, said leader of the State Military himself smirking superiorly.

"So _what_ if my dad was distantly related to the Xerxesian royalty?! So _what_ if just because the royal line died out he's the last survivor of the first Alchemists?! So _what_ if I just happened to inherit the right to that kingdom when I turned eighteen?!"

"So, they decided to stuff you into some ancient ruins and watch as the Alchemic systems reactivated and restored the city to its former glory, pledging their loyalty to you," Mustang said.

Edward Elric––the Prince of Xerxes, though he furiously denied it––reddened with rage as he started off on a very long rant, causing Mustang to laugh heartily.

Eventually, hours later, Mustang spoke when Edward finally took a deep breath. "You know," Ed's former commanding officer said. "There's rumors that the Xerxesians actually sent ships to another continent," he said. "And set up a city there."

Ed shrugged. "It's been four hundred years," he said. "They're probably all gone by now, and even if they're still alive, they probably don't remember their original country."

"Whatever you say, Ed, but I still think this city of "Levis" seems very interesting . . ." Mustang trailed off.

Ed snorted, before waving half-heartedly at Mustang and walking out of the building.

The faces around him were all filled with content, many of them witnesses of the Tragedy of Amestris a few years ago. Central had been rebuilt, the State Military had been retrained, and the country seemed to be better for it. It was much different from the time he had been a State Alchemist.

Before Ed could realize what had happened, he was riddled with bullet holes. He glanced down at his clothes, which were rapidly being stained with his blood. He then looked upward at a group of wanted rebel soldiers from King Bradley's reign who still wished for the wars and bloodshed of the previous era, and everything seemed to slow.

Mustang raced to his window, his eyes widening in horror.

Ed wanted to heal himself with his Alchemy––which he tried to channel through his Xersian Royalty ring which acted as a amplifier of Alchemic power. However, it was too late. Edward Elric's golden eyes slowly dimmed, and he fell to his knees, trying to keep up his strength.

The world, which had seemed muted and paused, suddenly started again. Blue-uniformed State Officers charged in their direction, while civilians screamed loudly.

Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist, the Prince of Xerses, and the Hero of the People, slumped and fell to the ground, his usually bright golden eyes blank and dead.

[] [] [] [] []

_Unknown Amount of Time Later_

[] [] [] [] []

. . .

. . .

. . .

_Thump._

_ Thump._

_ Thump._

_ Thump._

A heartbeat slowly started, and Edward Elric soon grasped his surroundings. He could not see, but he could hear another soft, reassuring heartbeat. His mother's heartbeat.

Then Edward Elric closed his eyes, losing his memories for a while as he fully became Uzumaki Naruto, son of Namikaze Minato and his lovely wife Kushina.

[] [] [] [] []

A small, blond-haired child started crying, and Kushina smiled widely as she heard her son for the first time.

The doctor soon handed Naruto to his mother, who gasped in shock.

Staring up at her were not the blue eyes of his mother or his father, but the eyes that belonged to Kushina's ancient ancestors. The golden eyes of the Xerxesians.

_ It was true, then? The ancient prophecy handed down secretly through my people? The same prophecy that stated that the Xerxesian Prince would one day appear as a normal child?_

Kushina frowned. All who saw those eyes would know that they held power. Though she was only one-fifth Xerxesian, she still belonged to it's bloodline and secrets. Her own eyes and those of her parents and grandparents, who had founded the Whirlpool Country, were known to flash golden when they released power.

It would endanger her child.

She smiled, thinking of her child's fate. Perhaps he would be able to use Alchemy, an art that had been lost through history! Her child would be great, and he would be a great gift to protect the people. He would restore the great city of Levis. And even if he didn't, he was her son, her beautiful baby boy! Her sweet child!

She hid her actions as she drew a Seal––all that remained of Alchemy, and what her country was known for––on his forehead, using it to anchor a genjutsu. His eyes turned from a blazing golden to a bright blue, and she smiled. She immediately wrote a short letter in a sealed scroll, hiding it in a nook in the cave that she was giving birth in while her husband held his son with joy and tears.

But then she felt the Kyūbi stirring. At her weakest, someone was pulling the Kyūbi away from it's rightful place in her own seal. She closed her eyes in death, making her husband promise to take care of their son and always enjoy life.

[] [] [] [] []

_Six Years Later_

[] [] [] [] []

Uzumaki Naruto was understandably confused as he was called to the Hokage's office. He looked upwards at Grandpa Hokage with cute eyes, blinking innocently. "What do you need me for, Grandpa Hokage? I didn't set off that prank, honest!"

The Third Fire Shadow of the Village Hidden in the Leaves chuckled. "You're not in trouble, Naruto."

"I'm not?" Naruto asked. He was very intelligent for his age, something that stumped everyone around him since Naruto was mostly left to his own devices, the Village hating him for being Jailor of Kyuubi. Naruto's intelligence, however, was very rarely challenged as it was.

"Of course not," the Third Hokage said. "No, I have a present for you."

Naruto grinned, jumping around energetically.

The Hokage eventually calmed Naruto down. "You remember how I told you that I couldn't tell you who your parents were?"  
Naruto nodded sadly. "Yeah . . ."

"Well, I can't tell you who they were, but they mentioned in their Will that in case anything happened to them, they wanted me to give you some things."

Naruto's eyes brightened with so much pure hope that it was sad. "They did?!"

"Yes," The Hokage said with a soft smile. He pulled out a pair of small, wooden chests. He gestured to the first. "This belonged to your father, and contains some simple Chakra Control exercises, five D-Rank jutsu, and a C-Rank jutsu for you to study but not attempt," he suddenly appeared stern. "Trying to use a C-Rank jutsu without the necessary Chakra can be _deadly_! Under _no circumstances_ are you to try it!"

Naruto appeared humbled, looking at the chest in awe. "My dad was a ninja?"

"Not only that!" the Hokage exclaimed, grinning at Naruto. "He was one of the best ninja I'll ever know. He could take on those chūnin teachers that make fun of you with both hands behind his back, blindfolded, and without jutsu."

"Wooooow," the six-year-old said, eyes wide and bright.

"And," the Hokage said. "He wanted you to be powerful and strong to protect your Precious People, too, like he died doing."

Naruto took the chest out of the Hokage's hands, preparing to run straight home to the orphanage and open it.

However, the Hokage caught the back of his orange t-shirt and lifted him into the air with a large smile. "Aren't you forgetting something?" the Hokage asked, looking pointedly at the remaining chest.

"You mean _that's_ mine too?"

The Hokage dropped Naruto to the floor, taking off his hat and nodding. "That is your mother's. She told me that it is filled with fairy tales and the seals of her people."

Naruto picked up the second chest that was almost as long as his entire arm, tucked one under each arm, and ran off.

[] [] [] [] []

Naruto snuck away, opening the chest with a blood seal on the lock that kept only relations able to open it.

First, he opened his father's.

_Naruto,_

_ If you are reading this, it means that something happened to your mother and I. _

_ It also means that the Third Hokage has an important reason to keep our identities away from you. He doesn't know what I wrote in this letter, but he thinks that I only left you things that wouldn't hint at my identity. It's wrong to lie to him, but I couldn't take the chance, when it came to my little boy. However, no matter what, you need to know our names. It is you right, son. I should know, because I was also an orphan._

_ I am the Forth Hokage, Namikaze Minato. Your mother is the beautiful Uzumaki Kushina, who I love will all my heart. We wanted to protect you, and we had a bad feeling that our deaths would be soon. That's why your mother and I made the old man promise to give you these chests. They'll give you things to remember us by . . ._

_ ~ Namikaze Minato, _

_ Forth Hokage,_

_ Golden Flash of the Village Hidden in the Leaves_

Naruto blinked tears out of his eyes, but it was no use. Great rivers of tears flowed to the floor, Naruto's eyes squinted shut and his face set into a large, happy smile.

_I have a dad! I have a dad that loved me! The Forth Hokage that I look up to so much is my dad!_

Those were the thoughts running through his head.

_And I had a mom who loved me, too!_

Naruto roughly wiped away his tears at that––_I _**am**_ six, after all, and not a little kid anymore,_ he thought to himself. _I can't worry my mother who is looking down at me from heaven!––_and moved to the second chest.

He looked at it and opened that Blood Seal as well, gasping as he saw piles and piles of books, scrolls, loose paper, and ancient parchment. On top of the haphazard arrangement, another letter lay. Fingers shaking, Naruto opened that one, too.

_Naruto,_

_ I am your mother, Kushina. There are many things you need to know about your father and I. You see, I came from Whirlpool Country, which holds a great secret that you must not let anyone but your most trusted people know! Even then, try to keep our secret only to your children!_

_ Look around you and listen carefully before you flip to the next page. Burn it the moment after you've finished reading it, though you can keep the other pages._

Naruto did as he was told, and quickly flipped to the next page after carefully looking at his stuffed animals with a suspicious glare, hoping that Froggy wouldn't hop off to tell anyone.

_ I am a descendent of Xerxes. Or, more specifically, a descendant of a colony of Xerxes named Levis located on a different continent from them. Our people used to be able to draw Transmutation Circles on the ground and use Alchemy, but that talent was lost to us with time. Now, we only use Seals, though we are great masters of them._

_ When I moved with a small group of my people to the Village Hidden in the Leaves to hold captive the horrible beast Kyūbi, the Whirlpool Country was targeted by Stone Country, and it was destroyed in the Third Great Ninja War. All that remains of our vast secrets is the contents of this trunk. Many of our secrets are hidden in a code made by the Icicle Alchemist, and look like storybooks. Keep it secret. Keep it safe._ (2)

_ Study this as well as you can, my son. You are the last remnant of our once great and proud people._

Naruto blinked. _Alchemy? That was a familiar word . . ._ He obediently set fire to the second part of the letter, throwing the ashes to the wind.

He looked at all the different books, finding them interesting. The newer books were all easy to read, but the older ones looked like fairy tales. _The Tale of the Five Arrows, The Bearskin of Truth, _and _No Hope for Gilbert _were only a few titles.

He blinked, before cracking open a newer-looking book and starting to read.

[] [] [] [] []

A Week Later

[] [] [] [] []

Chūnin Instructor Umino Iruka looked worriedly at Naruto, who was normally the loudest and most annoying student in his class. Naruto was famous for playing pranks, yelling loudly about his dream to become Hokage and gain respect from the village, and running around with unmatchable energy. Iruka often became annoyed at Naruto, because he never concentrated and was willingly the Class Clown, wasting his great intelligence that Iruka had caught a glimpse of.

Naruto was silent.

When the rest of the class walked outside for their well-earned recess, Naruto remained so concentrated on his book that he didn't even notice when the class filed out.

Iruka slowly walked toward Naruto, looking at the book pile that Naruto had been going through during class.

_Ninja Tactics, The Story of the Three Goats, Countries and Their Customs, History of the Whirlpool Clan, _and _The Skies Tragedy._

From the front of the class, Iruka had only seen a few of those titles, and he hadn't bothered to look closer because of Naruto's silence. He had become curious when the silence lasted for four whole hours.

Naruto was peering at a map in _Countries and Their Customs_, writing notes in a large, thick journal.

"So, what are you looking at?" Iruka asked.

Naruto jumped, glaring at Iruka. "Hey, don't do that! You almost gave me a heart attack! Anyways, I'm reading, of course," he said, holding up a book and waving it in front of him.

"Well, yes," Iruka admitted. "But what sort of book are you reading? You're usually not so quiet."

"Lots of things," Naruto said brightly. "Mother left these books for me in her will. I'm going to read all of them!" he exclaimed.

Iruka froze, before putting on a gentle smile and nodding. "Congratulations, Naruto. I'm happy for you." As Iruka turned away, he couldn't help but glance backward at Naruto, who was once again completely enraptured by his book. _He looks like he's detirmined to memorize the whole thing, _Iruka thought. _Though, I really can't blame him. If my parents had left behind anything like that after their deaths, I would treasure them too. Poor Naruto . . ._

But Naruto was taken in by his books, learning things about not only the Elemental Nations and the Hidden Villages, but also about Levis, Xerses, and Alchemy. Everything was so interesting.

When Iruka told them about all these rules and regulations, barely letting them practice practical lessons, Naruto was so bored. But this . . . It talked about secrets, and history, and things that Naruto could actually use. It talked about golden eyes, and about descendants of royalty who could activate the city of Levis, which was now unfindable ruins, and make it repair itself almost instantly into the city it once was. It talked about things that seemed like magic, but needed so much science and knowledge to use that Naruto wondered how he could have ever considered such things mere "magic."

These books contained knowledge that awakened Edward Elric's memories.

As Iruka walked out of the classroom to help with the young students on the playground, Naruto's eyes flashed a bright gold even from under the blue illusion.

* * *

(1) Irony, much? Sorry, folks, I couldn't resist! What we do to these poor characters . . .

(2) _Lord of the Rings_ quote! ^_^

* * *

_To Be Continued_

_Please Review_


	2. Worksheet, Exam, and Surprises -- Part 1

**Story**: The Return of the Fullmetal Alchemist

**Disclaimer**: I do not own either _Fullmetal_ _Alchemist_ or _Naruto_.

**Author**: ChocolateCherryGenesis

**Published**: January 26, 2013

**Notes**: I'm nervous about this chapter, so feedback is greatly appreciated! People liked my first chapter, so I don't want to ruin it, but I'm still working on my writing skills and I want everything to mesh together well. And don't worry, I'll have a whole lot of flashbacks in chapter four, so for those who are going "Hey! Naruto suddenly aged by three years in one chapter! No fair!", I do have that. I also have a bunch of surprises in store. Let's see, a hint . . . Well, next chapter, the Hokage gets a surprise. For that matter, so does everyone else. One of the things I am most concerned about is the concept of a "General Information Exam", because I know that when authors make up too many things for their fanfiction, it can get annoying instead of interesting. The other concern is the numbers, since math, I firmly believe, belongs in very few enjoyable books. They can happily remain in textbooks. Very, very happily. But I had to somehow report the results, so I did not have much of a choice in the matter. Please, enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Two**

Worksheet, Exam, and Surprises – Part One

* * *

Three years later, in which Naruto continued to grow stronger and smarter, and during which time he was attending his fourth year of Academy classes:

Iruka sat at the teacher's desk in the Academy classroom, marking papers. He was thankful that he was back to full health, having been injured during a mission and living in the hospital for the past month. He flipped through the large pile of student work, absently taking note of the _swish_ sound as he moved worksheets from the ungraded box to the graded box.

He moved onto the last paper. Naruto's.

Iruka sighed. Usually, Naruto refused to study at all and only seriously answered the questions that jumped out at him as completely obvious. This meant that Naruto had the longest-running series of F's Iruka had ever seen in a student. He would once again have to return the paper to Naruto with a failing grade, lecture him, and then watch as Naruto's eyes filled with bitter disappointment. Naruto really would be able to get A's if he honestly tried, but Naruto never did.

He set down the test he was currently marking and tallied the values before marking the test with 90%.

Iruka rubbed his eyes in tired resignation, briefly brushing his hand against the scar across his nose. He looked at question number one. "Describe the Mission Statement ranking system in your own words."

In Naruto's usual barely-recognizable scrawl was a unusually detailed answer. Iruka scanned the answer tiredly once, barely acknowledging what he was reading. Then he froze, went back to the beginning, and read aloud: "The Mission Statement ranking system is the procedure employed to categorize Missions by criteria such as threat level, importance, and customer. A letter ranging from S to D is applied to describe the total overall difficulty of the mission and also the level of competence required in the ninja(s) to be assigned to the mission. D-rank is used most generally for Genin-rank ninja, while S-rank ninja is limited to Jonin only (usually ANBU Black Ops), except in extreme circumstances. On a further note, there are often times when missions are incorrectly ranked and labeled due to misinformation or mistakes, in which case the accepted procedure is to immediately inform the Hokage and employer as soon as possible . . ."

Iruka blinked. Then his mouth dropped in shock, his ears unable to hear the noise of shouting children from the playground outside anymore as he dug desperately through his stack of papers in the graded box for the worksheet of Haruno Sakura, who had gotten a 99%. He also read this one aloud. "The Mission Statement ranking system is used to mark the importance of a mission so that the proper ninja can be assigned. D is the lowest level, while A is the highest."

He looked between the two worksheets, comparing them with a disbelieving eye. It shouldn't be possible. Naruto was famous for being dead last. He would have been pleasantly surprised if Naruto had even managed just to note that the Mission Statement system was used to denote difficulty. Besides, S-Rank missions were very rare and almost never assigned. He had only briefly mentioned it in passing during his casual lecture –– last _week_.

_How can this be? _Iruka thought, leaning back into his chair and looking blankly at the white ceiling above him. _Naruto . . . Could he have cheated? No! I can't believe I thought that! Naruto would never cheat –– especially for such a minor test such as this! He doesn't really care about grades anyway one way or the other, he just wants to be respected._

Then what had happened?

Iruka continued grading Naruto's paper while in some slight awe. Naruto had answered every single question. Most of them were not overly good or descriptive like the Mission Statement ranking system question had been, instead written short and concise, but the questions were all answered to the requirements set by the Academy (1).

Naruto had, in summary, just earned himself a perfect 100%.

~ oOo ~

Naruto sat at his place in the large Academy classroom, one hand tucked under his chin while the other lazily held a pencil, tapping it lightly against the desk. He looked ahead at Iruka, who was preparing them for their General Information exam and holding a stack of said exams as big and thick as a telephone book as he passed them out.

Though the General Information exam was not _officially_ used to determine Genin, it still had some bearing on the team assignments if the students in the class passed the Genin Exam four years from now. The General Information exam was held once every year. Still, it was a bad sign if someone managed to fail their General Information exam (even just once). And on top of that, Academy students did not even know which questions they were supposed to be able to answer, since there were supposedly purposefully hard questions far beyond the ability of Genin to answer put in there to truly test their intelligence. (2)

Naruto glared at the thick stack of paper that was unceremoniously dumped before him with an ominous, hollow _thunk_. It was also used to weed out idiots, he could not help adding to his inner thoughts with a small sneer. (3)

Iruka smiled. "Okay, class," he said in a way that was much too cheerful for the tastes of the majority of the inhabitants of the classroom. "We've been studying for this exam for the past two weeks, so I know you can do this! All you have to do is attempt to answer all twenty pages of questions in the next five hours. Ready? Begin!"

In harmony, all the Academy students in the class flipped over their papers and penciled in their name. Then they scanned question number one with quiet concentration.

**[Multiple Choice]** _{10 Points Each}_

Question 1: You are in a clearing with two ninjas of unknown rank and you have no backup. Would you . . .

A)Fight them

B)Retreat

C)Attempt diplomacy

Explain your answer:

Naruto blinked. They were seriously putting questions this easy on the General Information test? He had heard from people who had failed that it was the hardest test they knew of, second only to the reputation of the Chunin Exams. But this was ridiculously easy. A first year Academy student could answer this! He remained with his hand tucked under his chin, eyes half closed as he penciled in the answer. (4)

_C –– Because there are generally three ninjas in every squad and you only see two, it is safe to assume that the third is in hiding. For this reason, I would have to take out the hidden ninja first before I could attack the other two and vise versa. In the same token, I cannot retreat because I could be going directly toward or away from the hidden ninja, during which time he could easily throw a shuriken and kill me. Since I am running under the assumption that there is a hidden ninja, it is also true that even if I remain still, this ninja could attack me at any time from moment I entered the clearing. Since I am not already dead, it is safe to venture that the group of ninjas do not immediately want my death, either because they are allied ninja or because they do not want complications. It would be best to talk to them and say that you would be happy to leave them alone, trying to sense the hidden ninja, and only if this fails to either attack or retreat depending on the circumstances._

Naruto sighed and scratched his left leg at the knee –– a habit he had picked up recently. He flicked his eyes to the next question, unaware that even Haruno Sakura was still thinking about the first one and tapping her pencil against her head.

Question 2: Arrange these ranks from highest to lowest . . .

Chunin

Academy Student

Genin

Jonin

Hokage

Sage

_Boring_, Naruto thought. Everybody knew that. Academy Student, Genin, Chunin, Jonin, Sage, Hokage.

Question 3: Hypothetically, what would you do if your commanding officer was killed during the mission?

A)Report to the Hokage and wait for further orders

B)Vote on a new Team Leader and continue the mission

C)Return to the Village

Explain your answer:

Naruto shrugged. Not C, but it could be either A or B. He blinked in surprise. Wait a second; it was neither A nor B! Iruka had told them a few months ago that during the Third Ninja World War –– because so many high ranking ninjas were targeted –– a policy was created just for that purpose. All Chunin and higher squads would already have the next Team Leader predetermined. It would be impossible to "vote" on a new one.

_None of the above,_ he answered. _The Number Policy created during the Third Ninja World War creates a system in which every squad member is assigned a number. If the Team Leader, #1, dies, ninja #2 takes over. If #2 dies, #3 takes over, and so on and so forth. Each squad in a group also obeys the Group Leader, in which case there is a separate number system for the larger group._

He scribbled in his answer, not even noticing that his eyes were fully open in interest and he was currently smiling at the challenge. As he scanned the paper, his smile turned into a pleased grin for a moment.

Some of them were trick questions, and some of them were not. Some of them were easy enough that a baby could answer them, and some of them were questions that seemed to have no answers. No, this was not just a normal test. This was a test designed to back Academy students into a cruel, self-questioning mental corner.

The examiners sitting against the wall wanted the students to be forced into a state of mind where they think: _Is this a trick question? Or not? The answer seems so simple, but then perhaps that's what they_ **want** _me to think._ Eventually, they would become stressed to a point where they were at their lowest. This entire exam was not just for "General Intelligence." It was also designed to measure exactly how the Academy students reacted to stress. Those who reacted poorly were practically doomed to be assigned to a horrible Genin squad with a low-ability Jonin.

Naruto grinned. Perhaps this would not be the waste of time he thought it would be.

Four hours later, on page nineteen, Naruto smirked as he noticed that he was already past Multiple Choice, Short Answer, and T or F. Now he was finished with the actual test and was on to Extra Credit. Naruto sighed in equal parts relief and exasperation. This test had been laughably easy (at least compared to how hard he thought it would have been). Of course, there were some things that he did not know, but most of it was a simple matter of taking apart a question word-by-word, searching for the trick, and then moving around it. Well, since he had been doing so well, he might as well get some extra credit. He might even be able to make up points for those questions he had to guess on.

**[Extra Credit] **_{25 Points Each}_

Question 1: Sketch at least five forehead protector symbols that you know of in the area below.

Naruto was glad that he had been reading so many books on the Elemental Nations, then, both in his mother's things and from the library. He was able to draw every major village's symbol and three minor ones. And that was only because he had been too busy reading the Alchemy texts that he had managed to decode to finish the other books.

Question 2: Detail the difference between a Scroll Storage seal and a Paper Bomb seal.

_Really? _Naruto asked himself with mild disbelief. There were so many differences, it would be hard to list them all. Hmm. Well, anyways.

For the next five minutes, Naruto attempted to explain the differences in writing –– but the small space underneath the question was too small. He had not even gotten started and he was already running out of room!

He gave an unhappy frown. He leaned back into his desk chair, slouching and lifting his hand in annoyance.

One of the Examiners made note of this, waited a moment, and then called on the boy after referring to the seating arrangement to get his name. "Yes, Uzumaki?"

Naruto's eyes were narrowed in irritation, though he tried to act politely. "You got any more paper?" he asked. "I ran out of room."

The Examiner blinked. Usually, people just wanted to go to the bathroom. Occasionally, they tried to complain about the exam. He had not heard a plea for more paper since . . . well, never. The General Information exam was something that one took in protest. No one ever volunteered to do extra.

The Examiner took a moment to look around the room. Haruno Sakura had the best test and worksheet scores, and the female almost seemed to be ready to pull out her own pink hair. From what he could see, she was somewhere near page fifteen. Next he looked at Uchiha Sasuke, the prodigy. While his test scores were below Haruno's, he was still extremely intelligent. He was on page twelve. Then there was Nara Shikamaru, who appeared to be showing some interest in the test and its many trick questions. He had already moved onto page fourteen (5).

The innocent Examiner shrugged, not bothering to look further into it. "Sure, kid. I know Iruka has some extra paper," he said, pointing a thumb toward the Academy Instructor.

"Thanks," Uzumaki said, face open in a smile but eyes now focused away from him now that the Examiner was useless in helping him get to his goal –– more paper!

It did not take long for Iruka to open his desk drawer and take out ten pieces of paper (just in case, of course) and give them to Naruto. The Academy Instructor concentrated, looking at Naruto's facial expression –– which he had been unable to see from his place at the front of the classroom.

The boy was completely focused. His blue eyes flew toward the paper held in Iruka's hand as it neared. The moment that the paper was within reach, he snatched it out of his instructor's hand and placed it on the table, hand suddenly flying across the paper. No sooner had one paragraph ended than another one began. The handwriting was a bit messier than the handwriting he had been using for the rest of the test, but Iruka still managed to scan a few words before he had been forced to turn around and once again sit at the front of the class.

"Seal? Fire element?" Iruka murmured to himself in puzzlement. What on earth was Naruto up to?

~ oOo ~

Naruto sat calmly at one of the desks in the Academy classroom, waiting for his teachers to enter the room and pass out the results. Many of the students around him were nervously fiddling or squirming in their seats, though Naruto did not understand why. Sure, it had been pretty hard, but it was easier than he had thought. That was just because it was only their first year taking the test, right? They were only in their fourth year of the Academy.

Of course it would not be too extremely hard. They were probably trying to ease the Academy students into it.

He looked down at the wood grains in the desk before him sightlessly, becoming lost in his thoughts. He still had suspicions about the test, but he had no idea why he had such a strong hunch. And more than how easy the test was, that _why he had that impression_ bothered him. He preferred to rush into things, so thinking of the hows and whys was pretty foreign to him.

He looked upward in mild surprise as Iruka entered the room followed by Mizuki. Iruka held a wooden box in his hands, which he set down at his private desk. "Congratulations, students," he said with a smile. "You all did very well."

The class let out a very deep sigh of relief, some of the students even giving small cheers.

Iruka gave a small frown. "For those of you who barely passed, I encourage you to study much harder this year. For those of you who passed with excellent marks, I suggest you continue studying hard to keep them _next_ year."

The class was much less happy.

"Well, anyway," Iruka said. "Enough of the doom and gloom. I have your results in these envelopes, and as you know the results are private –– only the other Instructors, Examiners, and the Hokage know what are in these envelopes. If you do not feel like sharing with the rest of the class, you are not compelled to. When I call your name, come to the front of the class. Akamichi Choji . . ."

When "Uzumaki Naruto" was called, the boy walked to the front of the class, hands stuck into his pockets. Unlike his usual outfit consisting of an orange t-shirt and blue trousers, his current shirt and trousers were completely black. As time went on, he had completely forgotten to cut his hair with a pair of scissors and a mirror like he usually did –– instead it had been growing out, though Naruto was barely aware of it.

He lazily reached his hand out –– his left hand, instead of his right, for some strange reason –– and took the envelope from his instructor's hand, sitting back at his seat and opening the envelope casually. Even though he was usually nervous about any type of exam results, he found that this exam did not bother him at all. It was like the exam was not important anymore. Not compared to the State Alchemist Examinations and –– Naruto blinked. What was he thinking about again?

Naruto did not know where these thoughts were coming from. Either way, the exam results were only ordinary exam results, nothing more.

He opened the envelope and unfolded the thick paper, looking at the official looking seal at the bottom for a moment before flicking his eyes to the top.

**_General Information Examination Results_**

_Uzumaki Naruto,_

_The total number of points available is nine hundred points, excluding extra credit. Five hundred points are necessary for a pass. Six hundred fifty points is average._

_Multiple Choice: 48 out of 50 Questions –– 480 out of 500 Points_

_Short Answer: 14 out of 15 Questions –– 280 out of 300 Points_

_True or False: 16 out of 20 Questions –– 80 out of 100 Points_

_Extra Credit: 2 out of 5 Questions –– 150 Points_

_Your total results are 995 out of 900._

_~Congratulations, you pass with the best marks of your class._

Naruto blinked disbelievingly. He blinked once again. No way. Was this a prank? And besides, the numbers did not add up at all! He remembered that multiple choice were each worth ten points, short answers were worth twenty, and true or false were each worth five. But the extra credit was worth only twenty five each –– he had only answered two, because he had been so interested in the second question that he had answered it with all the time he had left. So he should have only had fifty extra points, bringing his results to eight hundred ninety-five! Where did the extra one hundred come from?!

Naruto looked up at Iruka, who was studying him. Iruka mouthed, "I'll tell you later."

Naruto did not have a choice, really. He waited until class was done and headed home, waiting for his instructor to visit him and explain what the heck was going on.

* * *

(1)I thought this might be a little confusing, because last chapter I narrated that Naruto was really quite intelligent, but no one every gave him a chance, and here in this chapter Iruka is thinking that Naruto never tried. Basically, Naruto tried (at first) but no one really cared so he just sorta gave up. He only answers really easy questions. Now, because Naruto is starting to inherit all of Ed's abilities, he's becoming even smarter, so the "easy" questions turn into "all" the questions, because Ed is a genius like Shikamaru (if not even smarter). He never studies, but since he has a perfect memory and is reading all the books left by his mum, he has all the info he needs.

(2) Basically, the General Information exam (which I made up, of course) is taken in Fourth through Seventh years, in which students graduate at the end of the Seventh. I only mention this because I have no clue as to the age of graduates and when they enter the Academy, so I guessed that they entered the Academy about six years old and graduate about twelve years old (give or take). If you do know Academy ages, please let me know. My internet was out when I was writing so I could not look it up.

(3) Irony, much? Sorry, but I couldn't help but add this hypocritical thought.

(4) What I'm trying to show here is that Naruto is not aware of the level of intelligence that he has been gaining. Instead, be believes that everything around him just got way easier. It's a bit of a stretch, but it's more believable than the truth, isn't it?

(5) The way I figure it, Sakura would just blaze through the questions (though the trick questions would seriously stress her out and mess her up). Sasuke is also pretty smart, so I would say he would be just a few pages behind Sakura. Then there's Shikamaru. Shikamaru is a genius, but he hates putting effort into anything. The trick questions would interest him enough that he would take the test just to see what was in it, but I doubt that he would actually be interested enough to really concentrate, which is why I think he would be faster than Sasuke but slower than Sakura.

* * *

_To Be Continued . . ._

_Please Review; Constructive Criticism Welcomed!_


	3. Worksheet, Exam, and Surprises -- Part 2

**~ oOo ~ The Return of the Fullmetal Alchemist ~ oOo ~**

by ChocolateCherryGenesis

* * *

**Disclaimer**: I don't own _Naruto_ or _Fullmetal_ _Alchemist_.

**Published**: April 6, 2013

**Notes**: I know that this chapter is short, but I already had chapter four all the way written through and I wanted to publish it and I kinda needed to publish chapter three first. I didn't proofread this chapter much, sorry for that. Anywho, let me know what you think! Also, I've started a tumblr blog (actually, I started it a few months ago but didn't actually _do_ anything with it until now, yes I'm that lazy). If people actually visit it, I'll probably do a lot more cool stuff there, like publish all the different fanfiction ideas I get so you guys can choose which ones you like best.

* * *

**Chapter Three**

Worksheet, Exam, and Surprises – Part Two

* * *

Naruto sat at his kitchen table, eyes staring at the General Information results. He frowned, placing his head on the table next to the paper and sighing. What on earth was with these marks?

He banged his head against the table a few times, just to see if anything changed. He glanced at the paper again. Nope, still perfect marks. The only thing that had changed was the death of a few dozen innocent brain cells. He sighed.

Why did the world have to conspire against him? And he had been doing so well lately. Ever since he had gotten his mother's books and his father's jutsu six months ago, he had been inspired to be an even better, stronger, more intelligent person.

He did notice that there were a few odd changes to his behavior after reading about Alchemy, but nothing too major. Instead of orange, he liked red. If not red, black would do. He preferred the blue ninja uniforms to the green ones, if forced with a choice of two such boring colors. Schoolwork seemed a little easier, but that was only because he was reading his mother's books every chance he got. (1)

Right? Right. He'd even given up his pranks to read his books.

The boy sighed once again, waiting for his instructor to come in and explain why his results had either been pranked (unlikely) or accidentally switched with someone else's (more likely, but still weird). Perhaps his results had been switched with Sakura's results, because these marks could have only come from her. Or maybe even Shikamaru.

_Knock, knock!_ "Naruto, are you home?" Iruka's voice rang.

Naruto stood up, stretching his limbs as his wooden chair screeched back on the tile floor. "Yeah, yeah," he answered irritably. "Keep your shirt on!"

The nine-year-old walked toward his door and opened it, surprised to see not only Iruka, who was holding a stack of papers and a yellow envelope in his hand, but also the Hokage himself.

Naruto stood there in the doorway a few moments, blinking innocently upwards at the imposing adults in front of his door. "If this is about the toilet paper and the Teachers' Lounge . . ." Naruto said with his eyes narrowed. "I don't know _anything_ 'bout it!"

Behind the Hokage, Iruka growled. "You mean _you_ were the one to completely ruin the Lounge?!" he asked furiously, hand starting to crinkle the papers. "We found one of Akamaru's hairs on the floor and punished Kiba!"

"Um . . . No?" Naruto ventured. Well, perhaps he had not _completely_ given up his pranks––but he was doing much better now that he was too busy with studying the Alchemy texts to be lonely. Loneliness caused him to want attention, and there was no better way to receive attention than to prank someone unsuspecting. Or, really, someone suspecting would do just as well.

The Hokage allowed a smile of amusement to drop onto his face, placing a hand on Naruto's shoulder. "No, Naruto, I'm not here about that . . ." he said, ignoring the way that Iruka was working himself into a rage, face turning an interesting shade of purplish red. "Can we come in?" he asked, reminding Naruto that he had still left them outside.

Naruto was still suspicious, but he nodded and stepped inside. "Make yourself comfortable, Grandpa," he said, verbally disrespectful of the Hokage but always trying to keep the old man comfortable when he visited. "Are you thirsty?"

The Hokage sat down at the kitchen table, opposite from the exam results, looking down at them for a moment before looking back toward Naruto. "A glass of water would be wonderful, Naruto, if it's not too much trouble."

As Iruka leaned against the wall behind the Hokage, Naruto walked toward a cabinet and pulled out one of his mismatched cups, moving toward the sink and filling the glass from the tap. After it filled, he placed it in front of the Hokage and sat down in his chair, moving the exam results to the side so that he could concentrate on what the Hokage wanted to talk about.

The Hokage waved his hand. "No, no, Naruto, that's fine. In fact, that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

Naruto stopped his motion and placed the paper back on the table. He leaned forward with a dark look in his eyes. "You mean to tell me that _you're_ behind this?" he asked. "I mean, seriously, I didn't know you even pranked!"

The Hokage looked completely befuddled. "Excuse me?" he asked, eyes popping out of their sockets.

Naruto sat back in his chair with a relieved sigh, ignoring the old man. "So it was a prank after all. I mean, really –– me? Best of my class?" Naruto snorted. "Not gonna happen."

"Actually, Naruto," the Hokage said. "Those results are very real. And that's why we are here."

Naruto remained silent a long while, studying the Hokage and the small group of people who had managed to crowd themselves into the spot between the kitchen table and the wall behind the Hokage with a wary eye. ". . . Are you sure you're not pulling my foot?" he asked.

Iruka frowned, moving a bit forward to be apart from the group. "Naruto, what we want to know is exactly how you managed to do so good –– in my classes these past three years, you were definitely an enthusiastic student, but ultimately your scores were very low. Then, about a year and a half ago, you started gradually doing better. I only noticed a while ago, (2) but when I looked at the records it became obvious –– you had been improving for a long time."

Naruto shrugged. "Not that much –– I mean, I noticed that I started to get C's and B's instead of F's, but it wasn't that big a deal," he said. "I've been so busy that I barely noticed."

The Hokage took over the conversation. "And perhaps that's important, Naruto," he said. "There's nothing wrong with getting good grades––actually, I'm proud of you," he said with a wide smile. "But the change in your grades was so dramatic that we had to make sure."

Naruto glared. "That I wasn't cheating?" he growled.

The Hokage sighed. "You know that I believe you would never cheat," he said, "but as Hokage I have a duty to make sure. If you look at this, you might understand where our confusion comes from." The Hokage raised a hand to Iruka, who stepped forward and placed the stack of papers in the Hokage's hand.

The Hokage handed them over to Naruto, who looked at the cover.

"Hey, these are my grades," Naruto said, looking back up at the Hokage.

The Hokage nodded at the paper as if to say, _Go on, look at it._

Naruto flipped to the next sheet of paper, looking at his grades for all his assignments and tests at the Academy.

Like he expected, his grades for his first and second year of Academy were all F's. He knew that, halfway during first year, he had received his mother's books and his father's jutsu scrolls and had started studying extensively. He had barely listened to the lectures, instead reading his books. Naruto scanned third year, unsurprised to see more of the same. Then he saw a row of D's. A few months down, he saw a row of C's. Near the end of that third year, he was scoring B's with an occasional A. During forth year––this year––the A's had turned to an almost unbroken series of A+'s.

The three ninja watched closely as Naruto looked through the stack of paper. His bored gaze seemed to barely touch the paper for the first few minutes as the kitchen clock tick-tocked loudly in the silence of the apartment. Then Naruto's eyes froze for a second. He focused sharply on the papers before him. He shifted from page to page at a furious pace, before finding himself at the last page. Naruto then completely reread it, again and again. At the end of his study, Naruto dropped the papers to the kitchen table with a soft whoosh, the papers fanning out lightly.

"So you see what puzzles us, Naruto," the Hokage said, hands in his lap.

Naruto took a few seconds to continue thinking, before placing both elbows on the table and steepling his fingers. "I'm all ears," he said, eyes narrowed and deadly serious. The transformation from carefree Academy student to a concentrated _something else_ was obvious, though no less puzzling for its conspicuousness.

The Hokage took a deep breath. He knew that, before reading these grades, Naruto had not fully belived their claims. He had just been humoring them. Seeing Naruto's reaction to these grades, it was plainly apparent that he had no clue of what he had been doing –– and though the Hokage had truly not believed that Naruto had cheated, now he was absolutely certain of it. Still, he had to make sure for the sake of fairness.

The Hokage looked behind him, waving to Iruka. Iruka handed him the large yellow envelope. The Hokage nodded his thanks absentmindedly before placing it on the tbale before him and sliding toward Naruto with a swiiiish across the wooden table.

Naruto pulled the unmarked envelope closer and studied it closely, wondering what surprise would befall him next.

The Hokage leaned forward in his chair. "Do you know what that is, Naruto?" he asked. Naruto seemed tired, but also strangely excited. Perhaps it would be best to put off the rest of the visit for another day . . .

"No," Naruto said. "Though I'd guess it was my General Information exam."

"Yes," the Hokage said. He looked out of the window, but remained focused on Naruto, who yawned. "It's getting late," he said. "Iruka and I will explain the test tomorrow evening, okay?"

Naruto frowned. "Oh, come on!" he said. "I'm still (yaaaawn) not tired!"

The Hokage chuckled. "_Tomorrow_, Naruto," he said, taking back the envelope. He and Iruka left the apartment, leaving a half-asleep Naruto pouting behind them.

Naruto yawned a third time, stretching his arms. He rubbed his eyes with a sigh, ambling toward his bathroom to brush his teeth. "Fine, fine, tomorrow," he said.

~ oOo ~

A pair of golden eyes opened, looking at the dark ceiling above them. The figure remained motionless for a few moments, before his vision adjusted to the gloom. He turned his head slowly, looking around.

He could see pipes along the distant walls, and a wall of prison bars in the shape of a gate to the side. The bars were much too far apart to hold him, but he wondered if he was inside the cage or outside. He was laying on water, somehow, he noticed.

The figure lowered his hands from his chest to the water, pushing himself into a seating position and then fully standing up.

He was covered by his brown traveling cloak, which he tucked closer around himself. Wherever he was, it was freezing. His breath came out in puffs of warm air.

He crept closer to the bars in curiosity. He rested a hand on a single bar, which was thicker than his arm. It was filled with energy, he sensed––a huge amount of it. There was a piece of paper in the middle of the gate. He studied it, frowning. There were some similarities between the symbols on the paper and the symbols he knew of Alchemy . . .

He recognized altered forms of the symbol for 'containment' and 'sacrifice'. He twisted backwards to look into the area behind the prison. He strained his eyes. There, almost out of sight, he saw something. It was a large creature the likes of which he had never seen before, with nine separate tails waving around him in sleep.

He reached a single hand through the bars, before jerking it backwards in shock. Contained within the prison was an _avalanche_ of energy. It was malicious, in the same way that the homunculi were filled with negative energy. He stepped backward further, wary to get too close, even if the monster was sleeping.

Now that he knew what the energy felt like, he could sense that a few of the pipes in the room were taking energy from the creature and pulling it somewhere else. He followed the pipes, but before he got to the end he was stopped by a thick door. The pipes went through the wall, to their destination, but he could not continue.

He first tried to break the door down by slamming into it, but that did nothing. Then he clapped his hands together using Alchemy, but even that did not work. For a moment, he spotted a sliver of light poking through he keyhole. He bent down and peered through it with his eye, but the moving images behind it were blurry and he could not make any shapes out.

Eventually, he returned to the room with the creature, sitting down and waiting for something to happen.

* * *

(1) More little hints about Naruto changing into Edward! I LOVE dropping these! The source of the red and black colors are pretty easy to recognize, but can anyone tell me why Naruto "preferred the blue ninja uniforms to the green ones, if forced with a choice of two such boring colors"?

(2) I know it seems unbelievable that a teacher wouldn't notice that his student was improving, but for the sake of the story you'll have to pretend that makes sense. Also, you have to remember that Iruka was in the hospital at the time that Naruto started getting REALLY GOOD marks, and that's when he noticed Naruto's improvement in the last chapter.

* * *

To Be Continued . . .

Please Review; Constructive Criticism Welcomed!


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